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[08 Jun 2006|10:51pm] |
we are only one week into the summer and already it is amazing.
graduation is in 2 days. i dont think it has quite hit me yet that there is no more high school...ever. sunday will be a reality check im sure.
my mom and gramma and grampa arent coming to my graduation. why? who the hell knows. some family i have. they are stubborn and im still not clear on their reasoning for not wanting to see me graduate. i mean, i guess thats cool?
ive pretty much only been home to sleep and even then im only here for a few hours. ive been on the go every day since school ended. either at work, or with friends.
im becoming a manager soon, very soon. i have already managed before but this time im learning to close and open and do EVERYTHING a manager does.
ive made some changes for myself recently. probably the best thing ive done for myself. im so very proud. life is gettin better. i dont really have anything to be upset about.
ive been clubbing, swimming, meeting new people, partying...just not caring.
this summer is meant to be spent enjoying every minute of it cuz soon enough college will start and i will be working on starting my life.
=)
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| unfaithful by rhianna---- my song for the time being... |
[15 May 2006|01:24pm] |
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did i fuck up?
or did he fuck up?
we both fucked up, but i happen to be more at fault.
as much as he pisses me off i dont want to lose him...
[edit]
neither of us messed up. after talking with him, i came to realization.
all of that 2 years we have gone through is done with for good.
with graduation right around the corner im trying to move forward with my life, and being with him i will be in the same position i have been in for 2 years.
we never officially dated which is kind of messed up. he tells me that if im looking for a full blown boyfriend girlfriend relationship, then yes, i am wasting my time.
i dont believe in wasting my time, so we are both moving on.
umm so maybe i should look into finding another job?
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[23 Apr 2006|12:18pm] |
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oh no-snoop dogg ft. 50 cent |
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what a way to end spring break..
Party at Billybobs. Hell, thats a fun way to spend any day.
Me, Jenn, Erica, and Krista went to Bobs at around 930 last night. We chilled and watched the guys play beer pong til it was our turn. We did the 25 cup game. Lmao it was so crazy. I was downing so many beers cuz krista was gettin sick of beer so that was one less person we had helping us drink all the damn cups that the guys made. We left mid-game and me annie and krista went out into the garage. So there was no official winner for that game even though the guys were totally kicking our asses. Billybob came back with my Popov (which i lovvvve..and others do not... =o ) We started ripping shots and i ended up getting pretty drunk. Here is another night that is a bit blotchy. I tend to forget half my night anytime i drink now. that is badddd. Thank god im always with people i trust though. But of course once again, peoople got mad at me. How is it that i go there to drink and have myself a good time and im always the root of some kind of problem?? Gah, its cuz of Chris! I was dancing with John Mcculleff and Chris got pissed. Which in turn made Billybob mad. im like geeeeez i cant win! Chris gets ridiculously jealous. Oh and once again we had another serious talk, but being that we were drunk, i forgot half of what was said. i hate that cuz its important stuff...HE TALKS ABOUT HIS FEELINGS! Something every girl pretty much looks for in a guy. To know what is going through a guys head regarding relationship stuff and what not is a good thing. I do remember the topic of L-o-v-e coming up. Everytime he is drunk he says he loves me. I brought that up last night to him. I asked him why he always says that and hes like well dont you love me? im like honestly no..i cant love someone who has treated me bad for so long and stuff. But then hes like well i love you. Unfortunately that is all my memory will allow me to remember. Eff the memory effects of alcohol!!! But yeah, Jenn got sick off that popov. I dont blame her. The popov isnt the greatest thing in the world. I love it. But im probably the only one, too. So me erica and krista stayed with jenn for awhile. THe girl is a champ! not gunna lie. So those 3 left and i did whatever. me and annie just chilled with all the guys. then people started to pass out so me and cob went to bed on our mattress. Im really proud of that boy now. He has made a turnaround. Its been a positive move and im happy. Oh yes, we did talk about boyfriend/girlfriend and i do remember saying how i would love to call him my boyfriend and we talked bout that. im like, what am i supposed to ask people if they ask if i have a boyfriend?! hes like tell them, "yes i have a boyfriend. and hes the greatest boyfriend iin the world." so it is official now? Hell i dunno. we are just gonna say i have a boy. the end. I think ill talk to him tonight and see if he remembers saying that stuff. haha. Even when hes drunk tho hes still like there. he knows what hes saying. which is good. So last night was a success.0
Next weekend, i think a buncha people are hitting up the club. So, we will be back on the club scene. watch outtttt. ;)
This spring break has not been that bad. I actually had a good break. I really am not looking forward to going back to school though. thank godddd we have basically a month left until we graduate. I really cant wait. This summer is going to be amazingggg.
cuz you know, we are kinda a big deal ;)
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[16 Apr 2006|11:13pm] |
way to begin spring break in the 586...
Me and Kirsten went to Billybobs last night and had funnnnnn.
His house is honestly always garauteeing a good time.
me annie and tina kicked the guys' asses in beer pong...cuz we are sweet like that ;)
aaand i woke up this morning with a missing shoe and cannot FOR THE LIFE OF ME find that damn shoe..
i got to party with my favorite people in the world so it was for sure a lot of fun :)
being that im not going anywhere for spring break, im hoping i have things to do everynight.
i do have a 5 page final report thing to work on for rowzees class... its so dumb. i have to write on obsessive compulsive disorder..maybe ill just INTERVIEW rowzee for that topic.
prom is falling into place very well. Im not stressed like i was before thank god. i have a date and a dress. money is still ehhh cuz im still working on gettin outta the hole that the Comfort Inn landed me in.
haha...i found out some interesting news last night.. aaand for sure i called it. Its almost summer time and i knew once summer time came around again it would be back to the same thing it has been for 2 plus years...
me and chris...i supposed we are together. lol. swear to god he is a GIRL. its so weird having him show and talk about his feelings with me. Hell, i never thought the boy HAD a conscience. Hes actually good to me now. We arent 'DATING' cuz he doesnt want a girlfriend...same old bullshit. I figured it out by seeing how he is and its cuz he doesnt want all the responsibility that comes with having a girlfriend. Pretty stupid. But yet, he "realllly likes me and would be jealous if i was with anyone else." Oh yeah but apparently we are "exclusive". how can you be exclusive ifyou arent dating??? I dont get it. lol. so im just like whatever. We are only with each other and thats bout it. So im supposed to consider myself under the restrictions of having a boyfriend..but i D0NT actually have one. well he kinda is, just not with the title. JESUS CHRIST why is this so confusing! Im still considering myself available tho. oh well :)
mmm
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[02 Apr 2006|12:49pm] |
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so pretty much, the Hayloft last night was sweet as hell...
i came in 3rd place for the hot body contest!!!!
and the other top 2 girls were strippers.
i did damn good!
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[19 Mar 2006|02:56pm] |
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 OK so if you havent gotten the point yet, its PARTY TIME. Friday, April 7, hotel party. There will be a cover but unless 5$ is expenseive to you then it shouldnt be that bad ;) ill give out details if you neeeed.<3
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[07 Jan 2006|12:06pm] |
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Happy birthday to youuuuuuuuu |
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happy 18th birthday to me!!
thanks for the birthday phone calls, messages, and comments. =)
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[03 Jan 2006|12:11am] |
new years eve was amazing
i got at least 7 new years kisses!
oh, how i love my beautiful friends!
i did miss the ones that werent with me
break has been great.
birthday is in 4 days
IMA BE 18!!!!!!
no plans for my bday...
hmmm easily summed up
<3<3
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| bulleted stars |
[26 Oct 2005|09:23pm] |
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wow this week has flown by
*getting my SIM card tomorrow...cant wait.I will FINALLY have a working phone. My phone is like my child...and right now my kid is not living and im deeply upset. But tomorrow it will be alive again! :)
*got my senior pics back today. I get to pass them out now. YAY!
*wanted to go to BillyBobs this weekend with summa the ladies, but hes busy. ALL YOU GIRLS WHO WANNA GO PARTY AT BILLYBOBS DONT MAKE PLANS FOR SATURDAY NIGHT OF NEXT WEEKEND. Cuz we are going to his houseeeee.
*Chris wants a lumina now ;) I dont MIND saying ive got a lumina now ;) I LOVE my car now ;)
*Dyed my hair and added extensions. me gusta... :)
*Didnt get halloween off which is shitty cuz i worked it last year. Literally EVERY instore took Monday (halloween) off, but we all have to work it. Hopefully i will get out early and get to go chill with friends.
* i have a chocolate craving right now. hehe
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[23 Oct 2005|10:38pm] |
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I hate it when things go wrong
Homecoming was fun. I had a really good time with all my friends! :) I used 3 cameras last night and that still wasnt enough. Everyone looked so good and just hanging out was awesome.
But of course with the good comes the bad.......
I had a feeling that something was going to wrong last night. Kinda like those things that if its too good to be true it usually is...AMEN to that.
*Guy at walgreens broke my camera so I had to wait around to get a new one
*Bily Bob had me stressed bout later because he decided at last minute he didnt want everyone staying
*Was late getting ready
*Limo was 20 minutes late.
*We had a problem with the restaraunt bill
*2 of our people didnt have rides home at the end of the night
*BillyBobs-Yeah this is where the REAL drama occured.... There ended being quite a few people there. A combo of my friends and his. Not a big deal-he said it was ok because we werent loud or anything. His brother Tony was a drunken mess and anytime he gets drunk he FLIPS out over something and causes a HUGE scene. He flipped out last night cuz of all the people that were there. Then they got him to calm down. Well an hour or so later after my friends left, it was me, michelle, chris, karl, and mike chillin in the garage. I was sitting next to chris and we were talking; harmless stuff. Well tony comes in the garage and FLIPS out again because me and chris were sitting by each other. The thing is, BillyBob likes me (still) and Tony knows it upsets him when me and chris get together so being a "good brother" Tony yells at us; call me and michelle whores and threatens to call the cops and all this shit and tells everyone to leave. Billybob was yellin at all us to leave too. No one was in the condition to drive what-so-ever either. Long story short, we all hadda leave and Tony broke my phone which is what im REALLY pissed about. He broke my SIM card. So basically I have no ones phone numbers anymore and no working phone. Im sooooo mad. Billy Bob is going to buy me a new SIM card but that doesnt help with the fact that everyones phone numbers are gone.so yea. That whole incident pretty much ruined my night.
I called it too. I told everyone i had a feeling something was gunna go wrong. But other than that i had a really good time with all my friends! :)
i need everyones phone numbers again....
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[22 Oct 2005|10:21am] |
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PCD-Buttons |
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HOMECOMING TODAY!!!!
Im so excited!
My nails look cute! Playboy bunny design with red gems on them. :-D
Party Bus what?
I have so much to do.
Im out! :)
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[20 Oct 2005|09:21pm] |
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PCD-Tainted love/where did our love go |
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I should be doing homework right now, but I reeeeally dont feel like it.
2 days till homecoming!!!!!! I cant wait! Its gunna be awesome. Got quite a few people going to Billy Bob's afterward... :-D Gunna be a funnnnnnn night!
I made a shirt to wear tomorrow because our senior shirts are gross.
We lost in PowderPuff but that doesnt need to be emphasized. We all looked wayyy adorable though ;)
OH! got my Pussycat Dolls CD todayyyyyyy! :-D
and the Tainted love/where did our love go song could be it ladies!
Congrats to Ck and Nicole!
Thats pretty much it?
<3
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| support support |
[17 Oct 2005|05:28pm] |
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amused |
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Fefe Dobson- found her cd and Ive been listening to it :) |
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POWDERPUFF GAME IS TOMORROW!
and i decorated my car for it! :)
Tickets are 4$. Thats not that much moneyyyyyyyyy so you all better get out there and support those wonderful senior girls who will be attempting to play football!
[edit] yuck...no matter what ANYBODY says, the saying that "boys are all the same" still holds true. Don't let those sillies fool you.
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| homecoming weeeek |
[16 Oct 2005|12:34pm] |
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one more week until homecoming!!!
Soooo excited :-D
this week is a pretty busy week:
*Monday-football practice; pizza party, tie-dying socks, and decorating cars.
*Tuesday-football game (HOPE TO SEE YOU ALL THERE!)
*Wednesday-work and hoping to decorate our own homecoming shirts(ladies-lemme know if you wanna do this)
*Thursday-work
*Friday-homecoming football game (1st football game i will have gone to this year)
*Saturday- HOMECOMING!!!
*Sunday-not sure how i will be feeling that day ;)
I love it when my week is already busy :)
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| clap clap |
[13 Oct 2005|07:39pm] |
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Stay fly- 3 six mafia |
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I've been craving chocoloate
uh-ohhhhhhhhh
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[11 Oct 2005|04:13pm] |
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cold |
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hmm whoever has my cds right now and is listening to them |
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Its official. I am dateless for homecoming. :( Im kinda sad, but well, what are you gunna do? I think I will just have Michelle be my date. We always have fun no matter what we are doing or where we are doing it at. ;)
So I told him I loved him. My Goddd what is wrong with me?I can't believe I said it to him. I felt really awkward afterward. I dont think it was right for me to say it because I think it was just a spur of the moment type thing where I told him that just to see how he would react. I dont know if I do really. Yeah, see i really dont think i actually love him, I just miss him and am infatuated with him. It doesnt feel right to say it in my head that i love him. I would think if you loved someone it would sound natural saying it and well, it doesnt feel natural at all. Hmm which makes me look stupid x 100 saying that when I truly dont mean it. yay me.... : /
I have PowderPuff Football practice today. This girl that i face when practicing is insane. She accidentally busted my lip the other day. Shes really quick. Uh good thing shes on our side. :)~
Im going to the Piston's game on Thursday. This kid that i actually met through MySpace (who apparently knows who I am, but I have NO IDEA who he is...although he graduated from our school last year) asked me to go. We were supposed to have hung out about 10,000 times now but I always back out cuz I get scared. So this time Im going to follow through with it. (A) its a pistons game and im not paying! :) (B) I gotta give him a chance I suppose.
Billy Bob took me out the other night when I had a major breakdown and we were just talking and stuff and I guess the night before, at anthony's, he and COB were there and COB actually showed some emotion towards my feelings and told Billy Bob he felt bad for me cuz I put up with soooo much from people. I was surprised to hear that cuz he couldnt give 2 shits about me. But, he was probably just drunk so its just one more meaningless thing that came from his mouth.
Happy birthday to Michelle tomorrow! :-D
wow only 3 months until Im 18. That sounds so weird
Hmm...I think someone has some of my c.d.'s...... >:o
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[08 Oct 2005|11:46pm] |
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geez when am i gunna have a GOOD entry?
today was just gross day
I feel depressed for some odd reason...I hate it
A lot has to do with anthony and homecoming. Im upset about that.
And then I really want a boy.
:( Its bad that i find myself wondering about C again...ITS NEVER GOING TO WORK. I have to stop this nonsense thinking.
Im tired today which plays a big role in my crappy feeling.
Everybody has something to do and here I am... on a saturday night.with a car. parents gone. and nothing to do.
Im soo soo soo mad at anthony. I know I hurt him but he hurt me worse. :(
I may just call billy bob to come over
AND im freezing...
Im also done complaining...sorry
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| I just wanna curl uppp |
[05 Oct 2005|10:37pm] |
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STRESSED- thats the word id use to describe myself right now.
Family is just really bad right now. So much stuff is going down. All there is is hate and fighting going on in this house. Im sick of it. Im ready to blow and go off on my step family. THEY are the reason there is so much hostility going on around here. Its pretty much me my dad and my bro against them. grrrrrr
Anthony and John hoed me out for homecoming. I had a weird feeling that theyd do that too. Anthony was suppsed to be my date and all of a sudden he and John decide to go party at CMU that day. Yeah I know where i stand as a friend now. As far as im concerned, i dont want to ever talk to them again. And if they decided to hoe me out at the last minute b/c of C then thats ridiculous. I dont need people that are gunna treat me like that in my life.
I get paid this friday but all my money is already gone and i havent even gotten to spend any of it yet. Thats pretty bad.
I have court in two weeks and im scared. I dont want a ticket and to get points on my license.
On a lighter note, Powder Puff Football is awesome. We are gunna have so much funn playing. Im a linesmen. I got tackled to the ground in practice today but thats what footballs all about. Im so excited.
Karma's a bitch...
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| Baddddd |
[01 Oct 2005|11:42pm] |
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 mellow |
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PCD-Stickwitu |
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I gave in TWO times yesterday. Thats TWO times i gave in to TWO big issues. :-O I cant believe I did that!
1) Called Ryan. Was NOT supposed to call him. We were supposed to be on "not speaking" terms because I decided I wanted to be done with him for good. Wellll last night I go and I call the kid. I was like yeah, Im mad at you or something and he was like blah blah blah im not gunna hear this. So yeah. Then he said he'd call me today and this morning I was like uhhh, yea im straight on that. So I left him an IM today and told him not to worry bout "calling me". Cuz I dont wanna have anything to do with him that may accidentally cause me to fall back into that situation AGAIN.
2) Gave in to C. Oh dear Lord, I was NOT at ALL supposed to do that. Last night at work for some reason I was like hmm I want him. lol. Yea, so I left work to go to anthonys and called michelle and was like I seriously hate C and yeah. Well he and Billy Bob showed up to Anthony's later. I dont know what exactly happened, but we were talking and I'm like why are you always mean to me and hes like, "I just do it cuz I know how to press your buttons." I'm like umm oook. Then we just somehow ended up kissing aaaaand yeah... :-x
But at least I have a good excuse for doing both! ;)
I dont know what it is, but I cant move on. Like I ALWAYS end up going back to what I know and what Im familiar with. Instead of moving on, I find myself going back. (i.e. Ryan and C) Both situations are bad but yet I havent moved on. Why? :(
Anyways...
Anthony's was sooo much fun! Me, Jessica, and Emma went there and yeah. I started calling people to invite them and get sumthing going. It was a really fun night. Except I woke up this morning with 25$ missing from my purse. So somebody stole money from me. Im sooo pissed. But whatever. People are assholes and you cant trust anyone. i have an idea who i think it might be but im not gunna point fingers cuz i dont know for sure. I went out to coney with ck and michelle for dinner and then devon jurczak and mike dombrowski met us up there and me and michelle hung out with them. We went and got free ice cream from kyle at Dairy Queen. Then we went up to Papa Johns and Devon filled out an application for a job there. Then we left and they dropped me and michelle off at our cars (at dairy queen) and on mine and michelles front windshields was something written in fricking ice cream cake icing. lol. Erica wrote "Hey Bitch" on mine. how cute. lol. Thanks Erica! hehe. Except its on the drivers side aaaaand i kinda need to see on that side. lol. But its still on there. :)
Supposed to go out with Tom tonight but didnt. So, Christi is coming to get me and we are going out. Theres a poker party tonight and then I think everyone is going to Anthony's.
Yuck I have to watch an episode of Law and Order for my howmeowrk assignment in Debate. Yeaaaahh, i dont like TV. Geez
<3
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